How many different parts of speech can the f-word be used as?

• Noun: "Like fuck you will!."
  • Also, since this is contested: Hard as fuck or Yes, thank you, I'd love a fuck.
• Pronoun: "I hit fuck-face over there with a baseball bat." (both cheating and plagiarizing @Joe but you said nothing about hyphenated forms)
• Adjective: "He's fucked!"
• Verb: "I love to fuck while eating duck."
• Adverb: "It was fuck hard", yes, apparently it is used by some.
• Conjunction: "I went swimming, fuck the cold." (as in, I went swimming despite the cold.)
• Preposition: don't think it's possible.
• Interjection: "Fuck! I was sure I could find a preposition!"

Extra brownie points (abandoning all pretense at seriousness):

• Auxiliary verb:

  • progressive aspect : He fucking sleeping dude!
  • epistemic modality : Wikipedia's example of How dare you! could be expressed in a single Fuck!.

Here you go, the f-word used in all parts of speech, with a classical music background (this is a classic): http://youtu.be/7LZSUYoNPMs

The transcript in its entirety (sorry for all the f-bombs!):

One of the most interesting words in the English language today is the word ‘fuck’. It is a magical word. Just by its sound it can describe, pain, pleasure, hate and love. In language it falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb both transitive: “John fucked Mary” and intransitive: “Mary was fucked by John” and as a noun: “Mary is a fine Fuck”. It can be used as an adjective: “Mary is fucking beautiful”. As you can see, there are not many words with the versatility of fuck. Besides the sexual meaning there are also the following uses. Ignorance: Fucked if I know. Trouble: I guess I am fucked now! Fraud: I got fucked at the used car lot. Aggression: Fuck you! Displeasure: What the fuck is going on here? Difficulty: I can’t understand this fucking job! Incompetence: He is a fuck-off! Suspicion: What the fuck are you doing? Enjoyment: I had a fucking good time! Request: Get the fuck out of here! Hostility: I’m going to knock your fucking head off! Greeting: How the fuck are you? Apathy: Who gives a fuck. Innovation: Get a bigger fucking hammer. Surprise: Fuck! You scared the shit out of me. Anxiety: Today is really fucked. [HiveFunnies] Source: LYBIO.net And it is very healthy too! If every morning you do it as a transcendental meditation just when you get up first thing repeat the mantra: ‘Fuck you’ : five time. It clears your throat too!

• Noun: "Fuck you, you fuck."
• Pronoun: "I hit fuck over there with a baseball bat."
• Adjective: "And they leave a fuck stain on my couch."
• Verb: "They fuck all the time."
• Adverb: "She fuck(ing) screams so loud, I got a noise complaint."
• Conjunction: "I take Viagra, fuck I last all night."
• Preposition: "Come fuck me later."
• Interjection: "Fuck! I stubbed my toe."

Here is another video where the versatility of the word Fuck is explained.

Transcript

Osho used this sketch on the word fuck first in a talk in 1980 and repeated it again in this later talk. We have seen the original of this sketch being attributed to Jack Wagner, George Carlin and Monty Python - no one seems to be sure.

"When Friedrich Nietzsche declared, "God is dead," he himself became utterly helpless no consolation, no hope, no meaning. He had to go through a long process of insanity.

Nietzsche seems to me to be the most important figure that has dominated the world in this century. Without any argument his statement has infiltrated into every mind. But he was not aware of the implications. I have no problem if God is dead. There is no need to mourn his death.

The problem is that if God is dead, then you lose the most important word in your language and you will need a substitute. God was one end, one extreme, and when one extreme disappears from your mental vision, the necessary and inevitable is that you will fall to the other extreme.

And that's what has happened, Milarepa. Instead of God, `fuck' has become the most important word in our language. Even if Friedrich Nietzsche comes back, he will be surprised and he will try to resurrect somehow the dead God, because this is stupid. But you will need a whole report on it, a whole research.

One of the most interesting words in the English language today is the word `fuck'. It is a magical word. Just by its sound it can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. In language it falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb, both transitive, "John fucked Mary," and intransitive, "Mary was fucked by John", and as a noun, "Mary is a fine fuck." It can be used as an adjective, "Mary is fucking beautiful." As you can see, there are not many words with the versatility of fuck. Besides the sexual meaning, there are also the following uses:

• Ignorance: Fucked if I know.
• Trouble: I guess I am fucked now!
• Fraud: I got fucked at the used car lot.
• Aggression: Fuck you!
• Displeasure: What the fuck is going on here?
• Difficulty: I can't understand this fucking job.
• Incompetence: He is a fuck-off.
• Suspicion: What the fuck are you doing?
• Enjoyment: I had a fucking good time.
• Request: Get the fuck out of here.
• Hostility: I'm going to knock your fucking head off.
• Greeting: How the fuck are you?
• Apathy: Who gives a fuck?
• Innovation: Get a bigger fucking hammer.
• Surprise: Fuck! You scared the shit out of me!
• Anxiety: Today is really fucked.

And it is very healthy if every morning you do it as a transcendental meditation just when you get up, first thing, repeat the mantra "fuck you" five times; it clears your throat too!